Complaint Review: Lor Brino at Visitation Alternatives

I waited a long time—about six years in fact—to post this notice about Lori Museo aka Lori Brino and Visitation Alternatives’ services because of the sensitivity of my case (I was still in the middle of it) and because I have been through so much protecting my child, anything I wrote probably would have looked like sour grapes from a sorely losing parent.  I have seen similar rants about attorneys, judges or visitation places in long battles over custody and visitation.  They are understandable, given the stakes, but it is hard to mete out what is true and what is just the result of exhausted emotions.  Thus, the disclaimer here is that my comments and “ripoff report” that follow are based on events that occurred five to six years ago.  The woman could have changed, you may say to yourself?  Yes, I grant it is possible for people to change, but, as you may have figured by now, with ex-husbands or ex-wives or serial child molesters, probability of change is WAY different than possibility for change.  I do not imagine it is probable Lori has changed. 

My hope is—for the good of all children in a custody battle that questions safety and for parents trying to achieve the best for their kids—that she has left this business for good or, if she hasn’t, that she is working for another company who cares more about standards for the sake of children and holds her accountable to those standards.  In any case, Buyer beware.

So, let me start by saying, I am more grounded now and I have won full custody—100 percent physical and legal custody of my child.  All of this is NO THANKS to Lori Museo/Brino, however.  And, even though all is well, it has been many years since I dealt with this woman’s incompetence, I do not know if she is still offering these “services,” nor can I find a website or Yelp place to post a poor review, I have thought about how devastating her antics were to my child. 

Note: I am NOT saying “to me” or “to my case.” I am saying to MY CHILD, who already had gone through trauma by the time we got to Lori.  I imagine NO ONE escapes much tragedy prior to getting to the need for ordered visitation.  It is indeed typically the reason you are in that predicament in the first place.

Again, I want to post this review in a calm, professional way.  What anyone considering or being forced to use visitation services MUST know is that these services should be FOR THE CHILD/(ren).

Lori Museo/Brino DID NOT care about that.

My ex had four DUIs.  He was abusive.  He stalked us.  As is common with someone who struggles with substance misuse and abuse, he is a pathological mis-representer of the truth. (Note I could use other monikers for these descriptors, but you might question my credibility as a result and, by the way, there is no need to call names when you have collateral information PROVING the same—police arrests, jail time, written documents—all of which I shared with Lori prior to having to allow supervised visits again.) He had been in jail, forced into rehab because of my insistence and finally a trial; he had been found leaving my daughter in her wet diaper for hours, or sitting her bare bottom on a razor while he was drunk in the shower with her. 

He was NOT allowed to see her in another state without supervised visits, then NOT at all until he completed jail and rehab time when we moved out of state.  I was granted permission to move OUT OF STATE with my daughter because of his incompetence as a parent and the danger he put us in.  For those of you just now understanding how hard any court order to come by is, this is profound. NO JUDGE in ANY STATE allows a move away unless there is an incompetent parent or complete agreement from both parties.

So, after being in New York for THREE years, this man had NOT seen his child in three years, mind you, we went back to mediation, trial and he proved he was “rehabilitated.”  The court granted reunification.  I would be happy to share more details of how the case went down, but I don’t need to bore you—anyone may email me and I can recount the tragedy in real time on the phone, but it is too painful to relive here.  Suffice it to say, I had three lawyers in two different states, three mediations, a full trial, two years off and on of supervised visitation, and a third mortgage on my home to pay for all of these delightful experiences. 

I met with Lori beforehand to explain the gravity of the case. She ASSURED me she had “substance abuse” specialty/knowledge.  That turned out to be a complete joke, because after THREE years of this man going through rehab, flying out to this state, missing his daughter supposedly, he showed up to the first supervised visit with her late.  Wouldn’t you be early, if you hadn’t seen your kid that long?  I am early when I haven’t seen her a day.

In any case, we had to go back to court, to full mediation and much to my surprise, Lori wrote a GLOWING report saying nothing about this man’s tardiness nor him later stalking me and being inappropriate at other visits that Lori “supervised.”  She acknowledged his inappropriateness and said she would document it for my case.  When it came time for mediation a GLOWING report of him was prepared by her.  He must have paid her off. 

If you read nothing above, READ THIS LINE:  Lori or any other supervised visit provider’s service is supposed to be IN SERVICE OF THE CHILD AND REPORTS ARE SUPPOSED TO BE NEUTRAL BASED ON OBSERVED BEHAVIORS.

I had come from a more established supervision visit place in CA where there were clearly delineated rules and procedures for both parties.  We also, EACH PARTY, had to punch a time clock and be accountable for time—early within five minutes before the visit.  As clinical as it all sounds, you WANT THIS and should demand it. Believe me, later you will regret it if you have someone rickety and shady like Lori (or worse a family friend) to do your work.

When I asked for RULES and REQUIREMENTS of Visitation Alternatives, Lori could produce none.  She said she was “moving offices.” I asked again a few days before the biological father would be arriving and then it was her “computer broke.”  I reminded her that this is a person that BREAKS ALL RULES and feels entitled to behave however he wants. I reminded her that he was in jail. Needless to say, she was NOT thinking of the child’s best interest.  She later told me she had to write the rules, she had also suffered a miscarriage, so she got behind, etc. etc.

Bottom line:  when selecting a visitation service, LORI MUSEO/BRINO SHOULD NOT BE YOUR CHOICE.  That experience is painful enough without having an incompetent work for you.

Remember:  the court takes visitation workers’ recommendations VERY SERIOUSLY.  Therefore, you need an agency or person/people who are professional, judicious and competent.  She was none of these.

If you want to hear more, send me your email address and a phone number and I will gladly contact you.

Meanwhile: You have to keep reminding yourself, you WILL get through this phase of your life, but you have to be CAREFUL in whom you chose to make that journey with you—spouses, significant others and, most importantly, helpers to your kids.